James Bond Week at Totally Tortelicious

March 29th, 2010. By LucyC

Welcome to Totally Tortelicious—a review of some of the more bizarre legal stories making news. Goodness knows there’s no shortage of them.  

Master of a Walther PPK 7.65mm, but not a Twitter Handle…Apparently MI5—the infamous British spy agency and would-be employer of James Bond—is firing its Bond-generation agents for failure to get up to speed with social networking technology. 

So, part of the job description for international spies and hit men could read “In addition to being able to infiltrate hostile government infrastructure, carry out black ops and assassinate without supervision, the right candidate will have the ability to build their own Facebook group, utilize Twitter and develop appropriate MySpace content.” Seriously? 

I find this utterly depressing. 

Anyway… back to the story… 

Apparently one Jonathan Evans, the director-general of MI5, said “he’s concerned the agency is being held back by older agents (age discrimination anyone?) who don’t understand the world of computer technology. ” To quote a report on UPI, “MI5 has about 3,500 agents and plans to have 4,100 by next year. Many of the new agents are in their 20s and 30s.” 

Ah, but can this lot make a half decent martini? 

Speaking of James Bond… A UK plumber who apparently had had enough with traffic congestion and lack of road manners (and who apparently had a tad bit of a Bond fascination), managed to create an anti-tailgating flame-throwing device for his scooter. The device spewed flames at the flick of a switch. OK—who hasn’t had fantasies about installing something like this on their car or motorbike? Be honest…

Needless to say it all ended badly, with Mr. Furze, the developer of the flame thrower—that’s him at right (photo:REX) —being arrested. Well, it would be a little hard to go unnoticed when you’re using it. Can you imagine the 911 call?

Mr. Furze was held for possessing an object converted into a firearm, and released on unconditional police bail without charge until May 6, pending police investigation.

I wonder if it’s illegal to sell the device?

It’s not your age—really… An 86-year old woman who served beer at Citi Field and Shea Stadium in New York for the past 20 years sued her employer—Aramark—for reassigning her to a ‘less lucrative’ stand. Mildred Block alleged discrimination, arguing that it was her age that caused her reassignment. Aramark said it was because the line ups at her stand were long. Really?

Well, the judge didn’t buy her argument because Aramark apparently replaced Mrs. Block with Gloria Smith who was a mere 75 years old at the time. Really.

So Mildred is appealing the ruling, and her 59-year old son is backing her up, stating in a recent article that he felt the judge didn’t understand the case.

Well, it seems experience isn’t everything after all. And at some point we do have to make room for the young people coming up behind us—like Gloria. I just hope this working into your late 70s and 80s thing isn’t likely to set a precedent…

Well, we know it won’t for government agents…

Tags: Tortelicious

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