‘Ozzy made me do it’ not the Best Defense…

January 4th, 2011. By LucyC

Ozzy made me do it! A man in Ohio who was arrested for drunken-driving is blaming his arrest on Ozzy Osbourne. Really? How does that work?

Arrested for DUI on Christmas Eve, William Liston reportedly told police officers, “Ozzy Osbourne and his music made me do it.” Just on the off chance you’re not acquainted with Ozzy’s contribution to world music, he’s the lead singer of the heavy metal band Black Sabbath, which was big in the 1970s, as I recall, and he also works as a solo artist with titles like “Paranoid” and “Road to Nowhere.” Enough said, I think.

So, Liston is awaiting arraignment. And, it turns out that he pled not guilty earlier that week to charges of breaking into a medical office. No relation to the drunk driving case. He was released on a bond.

Maybe Led Zeppelin’s “Dazed and Confused” would have been a more appropriate music choice…

Speaking of ’70’s music, how ’bout some CSN Deja Vu? Sometimes, the answer is right there in front of you—as in this situation. Some bright spark thought he would do a quick drive-through robbery of a fast-food joint in Southern California.

So he rolls up to the drive through window and—I’m guessing—says—”this is a robbery—give me your money” (how complicated can it be?) But that’s when things started to go wrong—from his perspective. The quick thinking employees behind the window shut their order window and ducked. Smart!

But not being one to give up so easily, this guy drives to another drive-through restaurant and tries the same stunt. And remarkably, the staff shut their drive through window and duck. Deja-vu? Or was it the same fast food-chain?

No word on whether this guy was caught…

An Unfortunate Paring? Talk about overkill. A 17-year old girl in North Carolina was arrested on weapons charges and suspended from school. Sounds bad, right? Well, it turns out the girl accidently grabbed her father’s lunch box that morning, in a rush to get to school on time. Her father’s lunchbox contained a small paring knife—commonly used to skin fruit. Did anybody think to phone the parents before they called the police?

Hey—No Sleeping on the Rob! (ok, groan if you must…) You know, as much as we laugh at some of the less intelligent stunts small time thieves get up to, you have to admit that burglary is a physically demanding occupation. One needs to be in shape—or at the very least well rested. If not—it could cost you your livelihood, as a 26-year old crook in Germany found out last week.

The youth, who is not named, broke into an office in Berlin to help himself to some computer equipment, electronics, probably nothing he couldn’t carry. But feeling fatigued by his effort thus far, he decided to have a little snooze. Right there on the office floor.

Poor guy, he must have been exhausted. He slept right through to the next morning when he woke up to find himself in handcuffs in police custody. (I wonder if he was relying on his iPhone to wake him up?)

Tags: Totally Tortelicious

This was posted on Tuesday, January 4th, 2011 at 2:53 pm and is filed under Totally Tortelicious . Feel free to respond, or trackback. Read our comments policy.