Posts Tagged ‘ Tortelicious ’

Tortelicious: How to Rack up a $1 Million Speeding Ticket

August 17th, 2010. By LucyC

Welcome to Totally Tortelicious—a review of some of the more bizarre legal stories making news—and there’s certainly no shortage of them.  

Don’t get caught speeding in Switzerland! A Swedish millionaire has just done his bit to increase the Swiss GDP. He took his Mercedes-Benz Gullwing super car for a bit a ride—on the highway—and ended up with a $1 million speeding ticket.

He was clocked driving the $250,000 vehicle at 180 miles per hour—so fast that he got by two traffic cameras (couldn’t have been Swiss technology) because the sensors could only register speeds of up to 125 mph—first gear for this guy.

Apparently the ticket is the largest in Swiss history. Why so high? Traffic fines in the country that invented the cuckoo clock are based on a violator’s net worth, which has been somewhat reduced by this little joyride…I wonder how he explained that to his wife… 

No, That’s not what “Ride Free” Really Means… Continuing on with the theme of speed—a motorcyclist in Ontario, Canada attracted a little police attention of his own this week, for Read the rest of this entry »

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Call the DOL! Portland Lemonade Stand is Way Outta Line

August 10th, 2010. By LucyC

Welcome to Totally Tortelicious—a review of some of the more bizarre legal stories making news—and there’s certainly no shortage of them. 

Don’t be Calling that Temporary Restaurant a “Lemonade Stand”…Seven-year old Julie Murphy received an apology from a county official in Oregon this week, after having her lemonade stand shut down by Multnomah County health officials during a recent arts fair in Portland. 

The little girl, whose mother was helping her run the stand, was approached by a health official at the Last Thursday art fair on Alberta Street, because she didn’t have the $120 temporary restaurant license. Imagine that? According to a report by AP, Julie had been in business about 20 minutes when a “lady with a clipboard” approached the stand, and asked to see their license. When her mother explained that they didn’t have one, the clipboard-toting official told them they would need to leave or face a $500 fine.

As it turns out, if you want to run a lemonade stand in Oregon you need a permit, even if you’re running one on your front lawn. Eric Pippert, the food-borne illness prevention program manager for the state’s public health division, said “When you go to a public event and set up shop, you’re suddenly engaging in commerce,” he said. “The fact that you’re small-scale I don’t think is relevant.” Absolutely right, I say. Who does she think she is? Why should seven-year old entrepreneurs get a break?

And what about the fact that Julie’s lemonade stand was contributing to visual pollution, and obstructing pedestrian traffic? Did she have a permit to build on that site? 

I would also like to know if she was offering sugar-free lemonade as an alternative for people Read the rest of this entry »

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Wendy’s Robber Finds Less than $586 in Register, Complains

August 2nd, 2010. By LucyC

Welcome to Totally Tortelicious—a review of some of the more bizarre legal stories making news—and there’s certainly no shortage of them.  

Petty Cash at Wendy’s? I think this guy’s expectations of customer service run a little high. Apparently, after robbing a fast-food restaurant in Atlanta he called into complain about his paltry takings—twice—just so everyone was completely clear about how upset he was. 

Just to be clear on my end—this fellow donned a ski mask and gun and headed off to a drive-through window of a Wendy’s (what is it with Wendy’s? This is the third time a Wendy’s–related ‘incident’ has made the pages of Tortelicious—in as many months practically… one involved a couple of ‘ladies’ who attempted to taser the staff because of lousy customer service and the other involved food back as feed back… ).

He then demanded the person behind the window hand over the cash drawer, which that person did, and he took it and ran off.  Hey—he didn’t stipulate what amount of money he wanted—or even that there had to be any money in the cash drawer…you know you need to be clear when placing an order, as the two previous stories have demonstrated…

According to a media report, in one phone call the robber said “next time there better be more than $586.” He called a second time with a similar complaint. Ah, next time?

Talk about packing a killer punch—some guy practicing his knock-out punches knocked out his gas meter instead which resulted in a neighborhood evacuation. 

You know there really are some things in life you just can’t plan for and this guy is one of them.

He put his punching bag close to his gas meter—umm, that was smart—and then got started with his workout. So, man hits punching bag which hits gas meter which falls off wall and spews natural gas everywhere. Oh the insurance company is going to love this one. (and we were worried about hydraulic fracking…) 

According to a local media report, Deputy Fire Chief Tom Snively of Middletown, Ohio, said it Read the rest of this entry »

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Tortelicious: Car Keys Locked in Car? Rob a Bank!

July 26th, 2010. By LucyC

Welcome to Totally Tortelicious—a review of some of the more bizarre legal stories making news—and there’s certainly no shortage of them. 

Three Strikes… and a Bit…and You’re Out! A woman in Montana, who successfully carried out two bank robberies struck out on number three. Why? Well, she locked her keys in her getaway car, so why not? Ok, so I won’t feel quite so stupid next time I discover I’ve done the same thing in a very public place—like the supermarket parking lot. 

Maybe this woman was a bit distracted (although I’m not quite sure what would take your mind off getting away immediately), or just blasé about her success and got careless. Not only had she committed two robberies, she had also managed to escape while in captivity—as the expression goes. 

Apparently she was caught—at some point—but while under arrest she complained of feeling unwell and she was taken to the hospital. And, low and behold, didn’t she just make a miraculous recovery and check herself out. Free to rob another bank. Which she did. 

Needless to say she’s in custody now—but for how long is anyone’s guess.

Not Feeling the Love? Better duck. A 23-year old in Iowa City was reportedly overtaken by the urge to hug someone one Sunday afternoon not too long ago. Whether this was a special someone or not, I don’t know, and whether there was any back story to this—I also don’t know. Clearly something was going on because when the hugger went to hug the huggee, the huggee spurned him! So, the hugger did what any self-respecting Read the rest of this entry »

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Tortelicious: It’s a Lindsay Lohan Fan Club SCRAM Bracelet

July 19th, 2010. By LucyC

Welcome to Totally Tortelicious—a review of some of the more bizarre legal stories making news—and there’s certainly no shortage of them.

Lindsay Lohan Fan Club Bracelet—He’s Got One! I think this guy deserves some marks for quick thinking… he is on probation and forbidden from leaving the USA. So, of course, he thought he’d try…

He was caught trying to cross the border near Buffalo—(I’m assuming the border with Canada) but the border officers thought Mr. Eugene Todie (love the name) was up to no good when they spotted his ankle bracelet.

So Mr. Todie, (demonstrating quick thinking) apparently said he was wearing the bracelet in support of Lindsay Lohan—that’s her booking pic at left—who is going to jail this week to serve a 90-day sentence for violating her drunken driving probation. You know, these two actually do have a lot in common. I wonder if Ms. Lohan knows she’s a role model?

Anyway, the officers didn’t buy Mr. Todie’s version of the world as he saw it, and presumably sent him right back where he came from. So now he really is demonstrating solidarity with Ms. Lohan.

Ladies and gentlemen, please put your trousers on before addressing Boulder City Council. The Colorado town has decided that it’s had enough of half naked Read the rest of this entry »

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